


Waluigi Time

by nervousGeek



Category: Super Mario Bros.
Genre: Joke Fic, Other, written for my friend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-09
Updated: 2015-06-09
Packaged: 2018-04-03 14:22:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4104076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nervousGeek/pseuds/nervousGeek
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The reader finds Waluigi in their bed one night, possibled crawled through the window to rob the place..or?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waluigi Time

You're sleeping in your bed, sudden you see him out of the corner of your eye. (waluigi)

He's breathing heavily, and covered in mayonaisse. You try not to make eye contact, but its too late he's seen you. (Waluigi)

You roll over and reach for your cell phone, but he grabs your hand.

 

You struggle, terrifed. (wah)  
But he's too powerful, years of playing golf and tennis have rendered him hella buff.

You try to scream, but he puts one giant gloved finger over your mouth "Wah" he whispers sensually.

You're frightened, but also...aroused.

 

Never before have you encountered such a mans-man. That mustache, those overralls. There's no mistaking it, this was one hell of an alpha male. (wah)

"How'd you get into my room?" you say after approximately 15 minutes of stunned silence. 

"....Waluigi time" he wheezes into your ear, super hawt.

 

Waluigi sensually removed his overralls, and then his purple onesie under his overralls that was given to him as a gift from his brother Wario for Hannakuh.

At which point he took his shoes off, and placed then neatly under your bed, Waluigi is a lot of things but he is NOT a rude house guest (/invader)

 

"I...had no idea that purple shirt was a onesie" you gasp  
Waluigi stares into your eyes, shame washing acrossed his features "wah.."  
"No" you say "your secrets safe with me, Wah-senpai" you kiss each other so passionately Wario feels it from his home. A disturbance in the force. He weeps fat, ugly tears.

 

The kiss is hot and magical, you stare deeply into, Waluigis eyes. "Wah-senpai be gentle it's-...I've never" but Waluigi , perhaps sensing your hesitation, twists his mustache and says  
"wah" and you know, he's right.

He's the one you've waited for.

He's your...Walu-waifu.

That night was just how you'd always imagined it would be. Glitter rained down from heaven only stinging your eyes a little bit. The Sephiroth theme played violently in the background, and of course, Waluigi was there.

At first intimadated by the sheer size of his...Waluweenie, but much to your surprise your warp pipe was unusally large.

 

Too large in fact, Waluigi (being highly experienced in warp pipe mechanics) screamed out "WAH" as the warp pipe sucked him in.

You weren't ready, weren't experienced enough, you couldn't stop it. "Wah-senpai!!!!" 

He looks at you one last time, knowing whats about to happen.

 

With his final breathe, Waluigi wheezed out "WALUIGI TIIIIME!!" as he was sucked into your massive warp pipe. You would never see him again, as no one ever sees their first love again. But those words would stay in your heart forever more. 

As would his walu-weenie. In your heart and in your warp pipe.

**Author's Note:**

> A special fic, for a special gal if ya know what I meaaaan


End file.
